She's silent and he knows what that means. He knows the chances of the Jaeger teams coming back from this mission are slim to none, and he's furious with himself for fucking up his arm so badly that he can't go out with them.
"God, Gipsy..."
She's built to handle combat underwater, so a few tears dripping down her plates won't hurt anything. They probably won't even be noticed, really, thanks to her giant size.
His throat has closed up and he can't continue babbling to her anymore, not that he really had that much to say anyway. Nothing that would make a difference. He leans his forehead against the giant finger closest to him, taking a moment to try and get his breathing back under control before he pats the joint under his hand.
"I need to let you go, love. You've got an important job to do." He swipes at his face angrily, trying to wipe away the remnants of his breakdown. He needs to remain strong, needs to remain a symbol for people to look up to while Stacker is away.
He thinks she doesn’t notice, but she does. She knows what human tears are,
what they mean.
For once, Gipsy is glad they aren’t in the Drift together. She can maintain
a calm and stoic demeanor outwardly for him like this, but on the inside?
Gipsy Danger is screaming her pain, and the helplessness that she
feels eats her raw.
Soft, barely audible music filters through; a quiet, classical piano melody
for him and him alone.
It’s just a few bars but it’s enough for Gipsy to get her point across; as
well as hack into the song itself, and send him a quiet message at the end,
just before the music fades.
You can always find me in the Drift, Hercules Hansen.
He sobs out a broken laugh, startled that she'd think to do something like that, and then incredibly moved by the gesture. He needs to get out of here or he won't be able to hold it together anymore.
So he struggles to his feet, stroking his hand over hers as she lets it fall back to her side and, in a fit of nostalgia, he presses a quick kiss to her helm. He doesn't expect her to feel it, but it makes him feel a little better.
"Goodbye, Gipsy Danger. You're a really special girl, you know that? I'm glad we got to know each other."
And then he has to leave, because the real world doesn't run on his schedule and sometimes things need to be handled like a bandaid being ripped off: all at once. He climbs off her back onto the support structure around her and goes off to nurse his wounds in private. But first, he needs to say a few things to his son.
Gipsy’s hand moves back down to her side and she waits resolutely for her pilots as Hercules leaves. That goodbye was one of the most painful things that Gipsy has ever experienced. She’s left feeling hollow and empty, though when her pilots arrive she’s shelved all of her emotions and locked them up in her memory banks; precious files that she holds very near and dear to her.
She takes nothing into the drift with Mako and Raleigh, and as they leave the Shatterdome and move on, Gipsy thinks maybe she can feel Hercules watching from afar, counting the minutes until something goes wrong.
Which…ultimately, it does. It was something Gipsy was prepared for – and expected. Her pilots hoped otherwise, that much she could tell, but Gipsy knew better. She’d known better all along.
And – she’d tried. She’d tried so hard to protect everyone, to keep them safe, like he’d asked her.
But when Striker self destructs to clear a path, something in Gipsy’s heart shatters.
Watching the battle unfold from the sidelines is one of the hardest things Hercules has ever had to do in his life. Is this how Stacker felt all the time? No wonder he was so grouchy all the time. If Hercules had to feel this helpless every day, he'd want to chew people's heads off too.
He winces every time Gipsy or Striker gets hit, has to grit his teeth against a pained noise when her arm gets ripped out of its socket — he knows how much pain the Jaegers are capable of feeling now and that...that's something he never wanted her to feel again — and though he can see it coming from miles away, he's still blindsided when Stacker suggests detonating the missile on Striker's back to clear a path for Gipsy to make it into the rift.
No.
That's his son in there, dammit, his last remaining tie to what life was like before the kaiju came and ripped his life to shreds. And then Chuck — god, Chuck, his stupidly proud, arrogant, heroic son — has the gall to quote his dad with his final breaths and it's all Hercules can do to just close his eyes and wait. He knows what's coming, he's said his goodbyes. But that doesn't stop him feeling like he's dying too, like his heart has simply stopped functioning and it's just a matter of time until his body shuts down as well.
He sobs once when he hears the detonation of the bomb, but then ruthlessly shoves everything down, deep down where he can't feel it anymore. He can't focus on that right now. He has to help Raleigh and Mako and Gipsy get down into that rift otherwise his son and his best friend killing themselves will have all been in vain.
Gipsy argued with Striker wirelessly about the explosion and tried to get him to jettison the pilots first, but he wouldn’t listen to her. It required a manual override, and there was nothing Gipsy or Striker could do – the idiots had disengaged themselves and Striker had no power over them anymore. Even if Gipsy and Striker had always sort of been at odds – she stole one of his pilots, he was as arrogant as Chuck – he was a Jaeger. He was like her. She didn’t want to see him die.
But she had to listen to him self destruct with Chuck, Herc’s goddamn son, inside. Striker was gone; it was up to Gipsy now – the last Jaeger.
For a moment everything was quiet – there was a distinct ringing in the air as the aftermath of the bomb left pilot and Jaeger rattled. Kneeling low, she braces herself on the ground, and waits for the crash of water to come back. They’re lucky Gipsy’s not crushed by the sheer weight of it, but she holds her ground, missing arm, crippled leg and all.
And now – now she’s angry, and the fury of Gipsy Danger is a terrifying thing indeed. Enraged, she snatches the body of the Kaiju Striker took out and starts to drag it to that fucking breach, pilots working in tandem with her movements. It was as much her will as theirs – they had to finish this now. How dare these things come in here and murder the population of this planet. How dare they touch Herc’s son. If anyone is going to finish this, it’s Gipsy.
They fight to get into the breach, wrestling the Cat 5 (Gipsy refuses at this point to bestow any kind of name upon the Kaiju, that tells her they’re deserving of recognition when they are simply scum) until Jaeger, Kaiju, and pilots all fall into the drift.
From there, she knows it’s only a matter of time. There is too much wrong with her form, too much damage. Raleigh isn’t going to be able to drop the bomb and get them all out of there – she knew that already.
When the time comes and it’s just her and Raleigh, Gipsy is resolute. He’s loathe to leave her – but there’s no choice.
For the second time today, someone Hercules loved self-destructs, and closes the breach. Gipsy’s blip on Tendo’s radar flickers out, and the room erupts into cheers.
Hercules watches the blip on the radar that is Gipsy Danger fall into the rift attached to the category 5 kaiju with a sense of detachment that makes him feel like he's watching a movie. He's seeing everything that's happening, hearing what everyone is saying, but it's like there's a screen between him and the real world, and it almost doesn't feel real.
Almost.
He sees Mako's escape pod start the arduous trek out of the Throat and he knows Gipsy's trying to force out her pilots to save their lives — he can't say he's surprised, that's his girl right there, behaving just like he knew she would, putting her pilots first and herself last. And then, after a long few minutes of nail-biting anticipation, the detonation at the bottom of the Throat appears on Tendo's screen, just before Raleigh's pod blinks into life, traveling mere seconds ahead of the blast.
Herc doesn't allow himself a moment for anything other than scrambling the choppers; they need to rescue their pilots. Whatever soul-crushing agony he feels can be put off until later, when he's alone and there aren't two lives hanging in the balance.
He watches as Mako's pod registers her life signs, watches as it reads being opened, knows that at least Stacker's child survived this even if his didn't. Raleigh's pod is on the screen but either it's broken or he's already dead, because it's not registering any vitals at all. The entire control room gets to listen to Mako frantically try to awaken her copilot, gets to listen to her cry into his shoulder and then...
That cocky bastard.
If the cheering before was bad, now it's almost deafening, with the entire crew of the Shatterdome lifting their voices in jubilant relief. Hercules feels like he's treading water as he leaves the control panel and walks across the room to grab the microphone, his limbs sluggish to obey his commands, the celebration around him leaving a ringing in his ears like he's underwater. But still. He has a job to do.
"This is Marshal Hercules Hansen." Marshal. Stacker is dead. There's nobody left for him. "The bridge is sealed. Stop the clock!"
Even Max joins in when the cacophonous cheering starts again, but Herc doesn't have the heart for it. Everyone he's ever loved has been killed by the kaiju menace, and now that it's over, he feels utterly drained. It's far too easy to grab Max's leash and slip out of the room, to head down to the barracks and climb into his bunk and lock the door behind him.
Everyone will be busy celebrating but Hercules wants to be left alone with his grief.
The celebration is long and loud – this has been a long time coming and people are tired. They’re tired and they’re worn thin from fighting and surviving and living in fear. It’s understandable that despite all of the death and destruction that accompanied the mission there is joy, too – joy that the war is over, the bridge is closed, that perhaps people can live in peace now, without fear of attack.
No one really notices Hercules leave the room, except for Tendo. Tendo is one of the few people in that room that truly realizes what it was that Hercules just went through, because he has supervised the visits, watched the interaction, heard the stories and witnessed some of them first hand. He’s one of the only people that realize what Hercules lost that day – son, long time friend, and Gipsy Danger -- whatever she was to him.
He doesn’t go after him, because this is an emotional time for the man, but Tendo vows to work on something for him in the coming months, when all of the chaos has died down.
For now, there is celebration – and mourning – to be had.
The coming months are busy for everyone – rebuilding is intense, and all of the broken pieces of human civilization need to be picked up and put back together again. It’s a long process for everyone, even Hercules. The jaeger program is lauded as a success, though it’s not exactly granted a lot of funding to rebuild the empire there once was. Few see a need, though there’s always a shadow of doubt about the kaiju coming back – or having bred. For the time being, things stay peaceful.
It’s at least a year later when there’s a tap on Herc’s door; a hesitant, light knock that reflects no small amount of uncertainty.
It takes Hercules days to fully emerge from his cocoon of grief, and that's really only because he feels bad about keeping Max cooped up in his room all day. Eventually the Marshal of the Hong Kong Shatterdome emerges from his self-imposed prison, and life goes on. People are careful around him, reverential in a way that makes him angry — he doesn't deserve it, he wasn't the one who sacrificed himself to save the world, he was just the poor schmuck who broke his damn arm at the eleventh hour and had to stay home — but at least it means it's easier for him to do his job.
It's Hercules who gets to stand in front of a panel of bureaucrats now, and he takes no small amount of pleasure in reaming them out for their short-sightedness about closing down the Jaeger program. They seem fairly contrite, but just as difficult to sway over to his suggestion of keeping it going as they were before when it was Stacker standing here before them.
The threat has been eliminated. There's no need for a money pit like the Jaeger program. The world is safe once more.
He tried to point out that there's no real way to know if they are safe or not, but nobody is listening to him.
So the next year passes in something of a daze for Hercules, his days sliding by on a strict schedule that focuses more on what needs to be done and less on his own needs. The grey that had started to sprout in his stubble spread like wildfire, starting at his temples and working its way backwards through his gingery hair, and the lines in his face grew more deeply etched as they days progressed. He got better, sort of, was able to smile and chat with support staff and civilians alike, but there were times when the Marshal would drift off into space and stare blankly at what he was doing, clearly lost in his own thoughts.
He was declared unfit for combat too quickly for it to be anything but a political move, but he's grateful. Drifting for fun is one thing, but Drifting to pilot another Jaeger?
He's done with that.
Most of his days are spent behind his desk, now, working on his computer or signing off on reports. So when a knock sounds on his door, he doesn't look up from the dossier in front of him, just mumbles a "come in" as he makes notes in the margins.
Gipsy Danger was presumed destroyed on the scene a year ago – but Tendo had been fascinated with the Jaeger’s AI. It had evolved more than any of the other Jaeger’s, and he felt that Gipsy’s had been worth preserving and had set up a system to back it up – memories and avatar and all – every hour on the hour, similar to the way a computer stores information in case a reformat is needed.
He’s damn sure glad he did, especially once he saw Herc’s face that day when everything both got better and went to shit simultaneously.
Creating a humanoid jaeger was a lot damn harder than he’d though, but he’d drafted the two scientists that had been on the project to assist. Newt had been more than eager to assist and the other…well. Awkward and infuriating as he was, he was an asset that Tendo needed in order to recreate Gipsy Danger in all of her self-created avatar glory.
Creating the ‘brain’ had been damn difficult; he kept the same anatomical structure of a human brain but used silica pathway tech combined with filched jaeger tech, and used that basic ‘format’ to map out the rest of Gipsy’s body. It all got very technical and when Gipsy was brought online – gasping and screaming and clawing at the air, because her last memory was being blown up, thanks Tendo – and everything was explained, a lot initially went over her head. She had to relearn quite a few things and under the careful guidance of the team, Gipsy was ‘whole’ again – as whole as she could be.
And consequently sent to Hercules. Since she had been created in secret she wasn’t considered government property, silica pathways and reinforced bone structure made from leftover Jaeger parts and all, she was sent directly to his door.
The knob twists and Gipsy steps inside, shutting it quietly behind her. She doesn’t’ say anything at all, she just comes up in front of his desk and stands there, resolute and at attention, hands behind her back.
Hercules has been in the military a very long time; he was in the Air Force before the Jaeger program was started. So he knows a thing or two about intimidation tactics and how one is supposed to deal with people barging into your office when he'd requested some downtime so he could catch up on his paperwork.
Which is why he doesn't look up immediately, just keeps on reading, waiting until he gets to the end of his section before setting his pen down and folding his hands over his papers. Only then does he look up, his eyebrow quirked and a, "Can I help you?" dying on his lips.
Because that's not some wet-behind-the-ears rookie standing in front of his desk, sent on a fool's errand by someone who likes to make his life hell, that's a very familiar woman, from the sleek black hair down to her (presumably) booted feet. He has a panicked moment of wondering if Gipsy really modeled herself after a real human woman after all — is this someone Yancy knew, maybe? — but the way she's holding her breath and resolutely staring above his head has left his hands trembling. No, this isn't some random woman one of the Becket brothers knew when they were younger, this is Gipsy Danger.
His Gipsy Danger.
His chair flies back and nearly hits the wall behind him as he stands abruptly, hesitating for a moment before coming around the desk in three large strides, and he doesn't stop himself from reaching out to cup her face in his hands so he can stare into those bright blue eyes, desperately searching for something familiar.
Gipsy is nervous when she walks into the room. She’s been briefed on all of the things her poor Hercules has been through, and with every word it broke her heart a little bit more – especially as all of her files were downloaded back into her memory banks. She isn’t sure how he will react to her, but through her teams urging, she’d come. She’d come and now she was here for what felt like judgment and when he didn’t look up at first she very nearly turned around and left.
But, no. She stays – she stays, because it’s him – because it’s her pilot that she’s come back for, her Hercules. She’s not standing in front of Mako, or Raleigh – only Hercules.
By the time he finally looks up at her, Gipsy is trembling. She’s unused to being in a body like this, and no amount of education by Tendo had really prepared her for what it would be like in the ‘real’ world. She’s terrified he’s going to reject her, and the way he comes at her tempts her to flee, but she stands there and refuses to move. She’s glad she stays, too.
His hands are like fire on her skin – this is more real than it’s ever been and she’s still shaking when she looks him in the eye and smiles softly, reaching to cover one of his hands with her own.
He doesn't sob — he's cried all the tears he could possibly produce, back in those long weeks after the rift was closed — just stands there and stares at her with huge, shocked eyes. He'd be convinced he's dreaming, but he hates doing paperwork, why the hell would he dream about that?
It's not until she verifies her identity that his hands start to tremble again. God, she even sounds the same.
He breathes out her name on a disbelieving sigh before he leans in and smashes his mouth against hers in a horribly uncoordinated but still passionate kiss. Only for a moment, though, because then he's just pulling her into his arms and squeezing her in a crushing hug, ducking his head and nosing into her hair as incredulous laughter builds in his chest.
"Jesus Christ, are you fucking with me?"
But no, she feels pretty solid under his hands. He yanks her back again so he can stare at her some more, cataloging every little detail that looks exactly as he remembered.
This is something that she had wanted – desperately – for some time before she’d gone into that rift and never reemerged. She’d wanted to hold her beloved pilot, feel his real heat against her body, touch his hair and smooth her hands over the lines of his face - lines that had increased over the past year.
Gipsy doesn’t care, though. She doesn’t care at all, because she’s with him in the here and now and that is what’s important. It is strange not being able to nose into his thoughts at any given point in time, but it’s something she’s mostly used to now, thanks to the team that had created her.
The sound she makes when she’s kissed is something akin to a meep and vaguely reminiscent of the beeps she used to make when telling him yes. It’s welcomed even if it doesn’t laugh, and she’s quickly buried into an embrace that has her grunting with the force of it.
“I would never ‘kid’ about---“
She’s being pushed back out again to be looked over, and she settles her hands on his shoulders to steady him, giving him a look he’s probably very familiar with.
God, that look she gives him. It's so perfect, so absolutely her, that he can't help laughing again, his hands rising once more to frame her face and stroke over her hair, tucking her sleek bob back behind her ears so he can see her properly.
"It really is you."
His thumbs stroke over her cheeks slowly, finally steady but for the fainted of trembling in his wrists, and this time when he leans in to kiss her, he's far more gentle about it.
He should probably check to make sure this is okay, but if there's one thing he knows about Gipsy Danger, it's that she has no problems with making her displeasure known. If she didn't want him kissing her, she'd have knocked him arse over teakettle back behind his desk.
So he tries to make this one make up for their first kiss, uses his hands to tilt her head just enough so that when he slides his lips over hers, it's sweet and tender instead of rough and awkward, even though his five o' clock shadow is nearing a nine o' clock one by this point in time. Everything about this moment is so much more real than he was prepared for; from the feel of her skin to the touch of her hands to the smell of her hair.
The impossibility of it is overwhelming -- she knows, she felt similarly when she was first brought back online. She'd fought like a bagged cat to get to him too, but had eventually seen the wisdom in her teams restraint. She needed to adjust to her new body. Training was needed, education -- everything. It was like being a child and starting all over again --- though that analogy had been hard for Gipsy to understand until it was put into more appropriate terms.
"It's me," she clarifies gently, the smile still there on her lips. "It's really me." And then he kisses her and she's lost in her pilot, an emotional hurricane flooding every fiber of her synthetic being.
It's beautiful - everything about this moment is beautiful. The awkwardness of their first kiss, his disbelief, the feeling of his 'shadow' against her skin; all of it is strangely perfect and Gipsy wouldn't have it any other way.
The kiss is sweet and tender and it makes her tremble in his grasp, body quivering a little under his touch. It's responding in ways that she's not familiar with, but ways she'd been warned about.
"Hercules--" She pauses, dragging in a breath and she was stunned at how low her voice sounded at the moment. "I--ah--"
He's going to demand every little detail about her rebirth as soon as he's able to think, but right now he's a little caught up in other things.
She pulls away first and he lets her, presses his lips instead to her forehead and her temple, his hands roving over her spine like he can't help himself from testing out whether or not she's really real or if she's just a hallucination. Despite her repeated reassurances, he's going to need a little time to wrap his head around this.
"Yes, love?" Her voice is beautiful and hearing her say his name like that...
Oh. Oh.
He hadn't thought about it but this is an assault of firsts for Gipsy. She's probably feeling a lot of things she's not used to right now, and damn that's hot. Shit. Keep it together, old man.
Her hands lift and she cups his face, not unlike the way she used to do when they were Drifting together. Her affection for him hasn't gone away at all, if anything -- it's amplified ten fold. She can't keep her hands off of him in much the same way he seems to be currently attached to her.
She sighs and she leans in to kiss him again, eager for the strangely familiar taste of him once more. It reminds her a little bit of being in the Drift - she's been so in tune with him and his thoughts that...well. He tastes a bit like he...felt and that? Wouldn't make sense to anyone other than Gipsy.
She wants everything that he has, she wants to be part of him and be with him like in those memories she'd seen of his and she can tell that that's what her body wants as well but she should really keep it together. Right? Right. She barely knows enough about human nature to jump in head first, though honestly -- isn't that what humans do anyway?
"I missed you." The fingers of her right hand are on his cheek again, tips tracing little paths and lines from his jaw to his ear and back again.
She feels perfect, and Hercules feels like singing — no he does not, he has a terrible voice, that is an awful idea — because he's so happy. This past year has been one long drawn-out haze of pain and grief and even though Gipsy returning will do nothing to bring back his son or his best friend...he's not alone anymore.
Finally, Hercules Hansen isn't a ship loose from its moorings, lost at sea.
Gipsy seems just as eager to kiss him as he is to kiss her, and he would take a moment to marvel at how good she is at this, but then again, she's always been a quick study. He nuzzles a fond little kiss to her lips again, smiling too much to really make it go anywhere, and leans into the brush of her fingertips.
"Oh, darling. I missed you too." So goddamn much.
He's got one hand settled comfortably at the base of her spine, holding her close as the other cradles the back of her neck, his thumb brushing against her hairline, marveling at how perfectly made she is.
"Tendo." It's a quiet word, but uttered with mild amusement. "You can thank Tendo."
Or yell at him. Gipsy isn't sure what it is that Hercules feels like doing, but she's fairly certain that he's not going to be all that displeased with the man, if the look in his eyes -- directed at her, and only her -- and the way he's touching her so gently and tenderly is any indication.
"It was his idea. He thought my AI was too well developed to ever truly lose. He had been backing up all of my files, just in case something happened." And...as they both know, something had happened.
"Do you remember the scientists? Newton and Hermann?"
"That nosy bastard." He sounds anything but pissed off, though.
How could he be angry? Gipsy is alive again, alive and in a form that lets him actually touch her, kiss her, feel her skin beneath his hands and know that she's real again. He'd been so tempted to Drift, in those long months after the final battle, because then he could relive the moments they shared together, relive the better times with Chuck, relive his friendship with Stacker. But Drifting was too dangerous, it was decided, and he'd been totally cut off, leaving him with rapidly-fading memories.
"God, I could kiss him."
Not going to happen. But the fervent gratitude is there.
"Yeah, of course I do. They're a bit hard to forget."
"I'd prefer it if you reserved that right for only me," she's teasing him, of all things. "But I suppose I could forgive one time..."
Gipsy's arms fasten around his waist and she stays right there close to him, unwilling to break the embrace that she'd craved for so long.
"They assisted. I am..." She hesitates. "Synthetic, they said. A synthetic human. I look and feel and taste and touch like you, but my bones...they are recycled Jaeger metal." She seems very hesitant to go into more detail -- she doesn't want him to feel weird, and doesn't want him to push her away.
"I'm almost as human as you, Hercules." She's speaking too fast, glossing over more details. "It's just...I have silica pathways instead of blood vessels." She exhales. "And I have to breath and eat and drink, just like you."
And, you know -- she's very obviously female. Tendo was thorough.
"Is it alright?" Gipsy echoes a question she asked him a long time ago, and gives him a similarly anxious look, uncertain of how he's going to react to any of this. She's still technically a machine, when it boiled down to it -- a humanized Jaeger.
"I guess I could restrain myself..." It's so easy to fall into this little pattern of a teasing back-and-forth, like the past year hadn't happened at all and he was still clambering up 25 stories to climb inside her cockpit and Drift with her.
She starts to tell him her story but there's a hesitation to her, a reluctant to go into great detail that has him frowning and cupping her face in one hand.
The last thing he wants is for her to feel uncomfortable around him, he never wanted that.
"Is it alright?" He lifts incredulous brows. "Gipsy, baby, you're alive, of course it's alright!" He couldn't give two shits about her status as a machine or not. She's standing here in front of him, her mind is exactly the same as it used to be, her voice is the same, her hands are the same... Who fucking cares if her bones are metal or she doesn't have proper blood? Hercules certainly doesn't. "Is it alright. Honestly, who do you think I am?"
Shaking his head fondly at her, he kisses her again, nibbling at her lower lip just because he can and because, blood vessels or not, it feels so plush beneath his.
She'd started to argue, started to tell him that she couldn't be positive how strange he'd think all of this, and if he'd reject the thought of having a Jaeger stand here in front of him, looking and feeling like a human but remaining entirely different at her core.
He answers the question with his kiss, and he has her making a quiet noise against his mouth because that? Is amazing. Her fingers fist in his shirt and she has to remember to dial back - as always - because while she's human on the outside, on the inside she's made of fucking Jaeger metal and could probably punch her way through a goddamn concrete wall.
She mumbles his name and it comes out a little more ragged than she'd anticipated. He's managed to again set all of her senses on fire and she's putty in his hands, pliable and eager and entirely willing.
As soon as he realizes that she's still as strong as she used to be, he's going to mumble something asinine like that's so hot and get her to show him just how strong she really is. Because if there's one thing Hercules Hansen likes, it's strong women.
He ends up leaning back against the edge of his desk, his knees spread, coaxing her to come closer and stand between them so they're more of a height as he kisses her again.
They should probably stop, they're in his office, for god's sake, but he feels absolutely no desire to stop this, because this involves kissing her until her lips are pink and shiny and then kissing her some more, because damn. She's beautiful, and he has to taste her. Licking past her lips, he strokes his tongue along hers, whatever it was he was planning on saying getting lost between them.
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no subject
Date: 2013-07-19 07:17 pm (UTC)"God, Gipsy..."
She's built to handle combat underwater, so a few tears dripping down her plates won't hurt anything. They probably won't even be noticed, really, thanks to her giant size.
His throat has closed up and he can't continue babbling to her anymore, not that he really had that much to say anyway. Nothing that would make a difference. He leans his forehead against the giant finger closest to him, taking a moment to try and get his breathing back under control before he pats the joint under his hand.
"I need to let you go, love. You've got an important job to do." He swipes at his face angrily, trying to wipe away the remnants of his breakdown. He needs to remain strong, needs to remain a symbol for people to look up to while Stacker is away.
no subject
Date: 2013-07-19 07:30 pm (UTC)He thinks she doesn’t notice, but she does. She knows what human tears are, what they mean.
For once, Gipsy is glad they aren’t in the Drift together. She can maintain a calm and stoic demeanor outwardly for him like this, but on the inside? Gipsy Danger is screaming her pain, and the helplessness that she feels eats her raw.
Soft, barely audible music filters through; a quiet, classical piano melody for him and him alone.
It’s just a few bars but it’s enough for Gipsy to get her point across; as well as hack into the song itself, and send him a quiet message at the end, just before the music fades.
You can always find me in the Drift, Hercules Hansen.
no subject
Date: 2013-07-19 07:38 pm (UTC)So he struggles to his feet, stroking his hand over hers as she lets it fall back to her side and, in a fit of nostalgia, he presses a quick kiss to her helm. He doesn't expect her to feel it, but it makes him feel a little better.
"Goodbye, Gipsy Danger. You're a really special girl, you know that? I'm glad we got to know each other."
And then he has to leave, because the real world doesn't run on his schedule and sometimes things need to be handled like a bandaid being ripped off: all at once. He climbs off her back onto the support structure around her and goes off to nurse his wounds in private. But first, he needs to say a few things to his son.
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Date: 2013-07-19 07:48 pm (UTC)She takes nothing into the drift with Mako and Raleigh, and as they leave the Shatterdome and move on, Gipsy thinks maybe she can feel Hercules watching from afar, counting the minutes until something goes wrong.
Which…ultimately, it does. It was something Gipsy was prepared for – and expected. Her pilots hoped otherwise, that much she could tell, but Gipsy knew better. She’d known better all along.
And – she’d tried. She’d tried so hard to protect everyone, to keep them safe, like he’d asked her.
But when Striker self destructs to clear a path, something in Gipsy’s heart shatters.
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Date: 2013-07-19 07:57 pm (UTC)He winces every time Gipsy or Striker gets hit, has to grit his teeth against a pained noise when her arm gets ripped out of its socket — he knows how much pain the Jaegers are capable of feeling now and that...that's something he never wanted her to feel again — and though he can see it coming from miles away, he's still blindsided when Stacker suggests detonating the missile on Striker's back to clear a path for Gipsy to make it into the rift.
No.
That's his son in there, dammit, his last remaining tie to what life was like before the kaiju came and ripped his life to shreds. And then Chuck — god, Chuck, his stupidly proud, arrogant, heroic son — has the gall to quote his dad with his final breaths and it's all Hercules can do to just close his eyes and wait. He knows what's coming, he's said his goodbyes. But that doesn't stop him feeling like he's dying too, like his heart has simply stopped functioning and it's just a matter of time until his body shuts down as well.
He sobs once when he hears the detonation of the bomb, but then ruthlessly shoves everything down, deep down where he can't feel it anymore. He can't focus on that right now. He has to help Raleigh and Mako and Gipsy get down into that rift otherwise his son and his best friend killing themselves will have all been in vain.
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Date: 2013-07-19 08:15 pm (UTC)But she had to listen to him self destruct with Chuck, Herc’s goddamn son, inside. Striker was gone; it was up to Gipsy now – the last Jaeger.
For a moment everything was quiet – there was a distinct ringing in the air as the aftermath of the bomb left pilot and Jaeger rattled. Kneeling low, she braces herself on the ground, and waits for the crash of water to come back. They’re lucky Gipsy’s not crushed by the sheer weight of it, but she holds her ground, missing arm, crippled leg and all.
And now – now she’s angry, and the fury of Gipsy Danger is a terrifying thing indeed. Enraged, she snatches the body of the Kaiju Striker took out and starts to drag it to that fucking breach, pilots working in tandem with her movements. It was as much her will as theirs – they had to finish this now. How dare these things come in here and murder the population of this planet. How dare they touch Herc’s son. If anyone is going to finish this, it’s Gipsy.
They fight to get into the breach, wrestling the Cat 5 (Gipsy refuses at this point to bestow any kind of name upon the Kaiju, that tells her they’re deserving of recognition when they are simply scum) until Jaeger, Kaiju, and pilots all fall into the drift.
From there, she knows it’s only a matter of time. There is too much wrong with her form, too much damage. Raleigh isn’t going to be able to drop the bomb and get them all out of there – she knew that already.
When the time comes and it’s just her and Raleigh, Gipsy is resolute. He’s loathe to leave her – but there’s no choice.
For the second time today, someone Hercules loved self-destructs, and closes the breach. Gipsy’s blip on Tendo’s radar flickers out, and the room erupts into cheers.
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Date: 2013-07-19 08:46 pm (UTC)Almost.
He sees Mako's escape pod start the arduous trek out of the Throat and he knows Gipsy's trying to force out her pilots to save their lives — he can't say he's surprised, that's his girl right there, behaving just like he knew she would, putting her pilots first and herself last. And then, after a long few minutes of nail-biting anticipation, the detonation at the bottom of the Throat appears on Tendo's screen, just before Raleigh's pod blinks into life, traveling mere seconds ahead of the blast.
Herc doesn't allow himself a moment for anything other than scrambling the choppers; they need to rescue their pilots. Whatever soul-crushing agony he feels can be put off until later, when he's alone and there aren't two lives hanging in the balance.
He watches as Mako's pod registers her life signs, watches as it reads being opened, knows that at least Stacker's child survived this even if his didn't. Raleigh's pod is on the screen but either it's broken or he's already dead, because it's not registering any vitals at all. The entire control room gets to listen to Mako frantically try to awaken her copilot, gets to listen to her cry into his shoulder and then...
That cocky bastard.
If the cheering before was bad, now it's almost deafening, with the entire crew of the Shatterdome lifting their voices in jubilant relief. Hercules feels like he's treading water as he leaves the control panel and walks across the room to grab the microphone, his limbs sluggish to obey his commands, the celebration around him leaving a ringing in his ears like he's underwater. But still. He has a job to do.
"This is Marshal Hercules Hansen." Marshal. Stacker is dead. There's nobody left for him. "The bridge is sealed. Stop the clock!"
Even Max joins in when the cacophonous cheering starts again, but Herc doesn't have the heart for it. Everyone he's ever loved has been killed by the kaiju menace, and now that it's over, he feels utterly drained. It's far too easy to grab Max's leash and slip out of the room, to head down to the barracks and climb into his bunk and lock the door behind him.
Everyone will be busy celebrating but Hercules wants to be left alone with his grief.
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Date: 2013-07-19 09:19 pm (UTC)No one really notices Hercules leave the room, except for Tendo. Tendo is one of the few people in that room that truly realizes what it was that Hercules just went through, because he has supervised the visits, watched the interaction, heard the stories and witnessed some of them first hand. He’s one of the only people that realize what Hercules lost that day – son, long time friend, and Gipsy Danger -- whatever she was to him.
He doesn’t go after him, because this is an emotional time for the man, but Tendo vows to work on something for him in the coming months, when all of the chaos has died down.
For now, there is celebration – and mourning – to be had.
The coming months are busy for everyone – rebuilding is intense, and all of the broken pieces of human civilization need to be picked up and put back together again. It’s a long process for everyone, even Hercules. The jaeger program is lauded as a success, though it’s not exactly granted a lot of funding to rebuild the empire there once was. Few see a need, though there’s always a shadow of doubt about the kaiju coming back – or having bred. For the time being, things stay peaceful.
It’s at least a year later when there’s a tap on Herc’s door; a hesitant, light knock that reflects no small amount of uncertainty.
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Date: 2013-07-19 09:30 pm (UTC)It's Hercules who gets to stand in front of a panel of bureaucrats now, and he takes no small amount of pleasure in reaming them out for their short-sightedness about closing down the Jaeger program. They seem fairly contrite, but just as difficult to sway over to his suggestion of keeping it going as they were before when it was Stacker standing here before them.
The threat has been eliminated. There's no need for a money pit like the Jaeger program. The world is safe once more.
He tried to point out that there's no real way to know if they are safe or not, but nobody is listening to him.
So the next year passes in something of a daze for Hercules, his days sliding by on a strict schedule that focuses more on what needs to be done and less on his own needs. The grey that had started to sprout in his stubble spread like wildfire, starting at his temples and working its way backwards through his gingery hair, and the lines in his face grew more deeply etched as they days progressed. He got better, sort of, was able to smile and chat with support staff and civilians alike, but there were times when the Marshal would drift off into space and stare blankly at what he was doing, clearly lost in his own thoughts.
He was declared unfit for combat too quickly for it to be anything but a political move, but he's grateful. Drifting for fun is one thing, but Drifting to pilot another Jaeger?
He's done with that.
Most of his days are spent behind his desk, now, working on his computer or signing off on reports. So when a knock sounds on his door, he doesn't look up from the dossier in front of him, just mumbles a "come in" as he makes notes in the margins.
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Date: 2013-07-19 09:45 pm (UTC)He’s damn sure glad he did, especially once he saw Herc’s face that day when everything both got better and went to shit simultaneously.
Creating a humanoid jaeger was a lot damn harder than he’d though, but he’d drafted the two scientists that had been on the project to assist. Newt had been more than eager to assist and the other…well. Awkward and infuriating as he was, he was an asset that Tendo needed in order to recreate Gipsy Danger in all of her self-created avatar glory.
Creating the ‘brain’ had been damn difficult; he kept the same anatomical structure of a human brain but used silica pathway tech combined with filched jaeger tech, and used that basic ‘format’ to map out the rest of Gipsy’s body. It all got very technical and when Gipsy was brought online – gasping and screaming and clawing at the air, because her last memory was being blown up, thanks Tendo – and everything was explained, a lot initially went over her head. She had to relearn quite a few things and under the careful guidance of the team, Gipsy was ‘whole’ again – as whole as she could be.
And consequently sent to Hercules. Since she had been created in secret she wasn’t considered government property, silica pathways and reinforced bone structure made from leftover Jaeger parts and all, she was sent directly to his door.
The knob twists and Gipsy steps inside, shutting it quietly behind her. She doesn’t’ say anything at all, she just comes up in front of his desk and stands there, resolute and at attention, hands behind her back.
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Date: 2013-07-19 09:53 pm (UTC)Which is why he doesn't look up immediately, just keeps on reading, waiting until he gets to the end of his section before setting his pen down and folding his hands over his papers. Only then does he look up, his eyebrow quirked and a, "Can I help you?" dying on his lips.
Because that's not some wet-behind-the-ears rookie standing in front of his desk, sent on a fool's errand by someone who likes to make his life hell, that's a very familiar woman, from the sleek black hair down to her (presumably) booted feet. He has a panicked moment of wondering if Gipsy really modeled herself after a real human woman after all — is this someone Yancy knew, maybe? — but the way she's holding her breath and resolutely staring above his head has left his hands trembling. No, this isn't some random woman one of the Becket brothers knew when they were younger, this is Gipsy Danger.
His Gipsy Danger.
His chair flies back and nearly hits the wall behind him as he stands abruptly, hesitating for a moment before coming around the desk in three large strides, and he doesn't stop himself from reaching out to cup her face in his hands so he can stare into those bright blue eyes, desperately searching for something familiar.
(If this isn't Gipsy, he's in big trouble.)
"...Gipsy?"
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Date: 2013-07-19 10:04 pm (UTC)But, no. She stays – she stays, because it’s him – because it’s her pilot that she’s come back for, her Hercules. She’s not standing in front of Mako, or Raleigh – only Hercules.
By the time he finally looks up at her, Gipsy is trembling. She’s unused to being in a body like this, and no amount of education by Tendo had really prepared her for what it would be like in the ‘real’ world. She’s terrified he’s going to reject her, and the way he comes at her tempts her to flee, but she stands there and refuses to move. She’s glad she stays, too.
His hands are like fire on her skin – this is more real than it’s ever been and she’s still shaking when she looks him in the eye and smiles softly, reaching to cover one of his hands with her own.
“It’s me.”
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Date: 2013-07-19 10:12 pm (UTC)It's not until she verifies her identity that his hands start to tremble again. God, she even sounds the same.
He breathes out her name on a disbelieving sigh before he leans in and smashes his mouth against hers in a horribly uncoordinated but still passionate kiss. Only for a moment, though, because then he's just pulling her into his arms and squeezing her in a crushing hug, ducking his head and nosing into her hair as incredulous laughter builds in his chest.
"Jesus Christ, are you fucking with me?"
But no, she feels pretty solid under his hands. He yanks her back again so he can stare at her some more, cataloging every little detail that looks exactly as he remembered.
"...How?"
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Date: 2013-07-19 10:20 pm (UTC)Gipsy doesn’t care, though. She doesn’t care at all, because she’s with him in the here and now and that is what’s important. It is strange not being able to nose into his thoughts at any given point in time, but it’s something she’s mostly used to now, thanks to the team that had created her.
The sound she makes when she’s kissed is something akin to a meep and vaguely reminiscent of the beeps she used to make when telling him yes. It’s welcomed even if it doesn’t laugh, and she’s quickly buried into an embrace that has her grunting with the force of it.
“I would never ‘kid’ about---“
She’s being pushed back out again to be looked over, and she settles her hands on his shoulders to steady him, giving him a look he’s probably very familiar with.
“You are making me dizzy, Hercules Hansen.”
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Date: 2013-07-19 10:29 pm (UTC)"It really is you."
His thumbs stroke over her cheeks slowly, finally steady but for the fainted of trembling in his wrists, and this time when he leans in to kiss her, he's far more gentle about it.
He should probably check to make sure this is okay, but if there's one thing he knows about Gipsy Danger, it's that she has no problems with making her displeasure known. If she didn't want him kissing her, she'd have knocked him arse over teakettle back behind his desk.
So he tries to make this one make up for their first kiss, uses his hands to tilt her head just enough so that when he slides his lips over hers, it's sweet and tender instead of rough and awkward, even though his five o' clock shadow is nearing a nine o' clock one by this point in time. Everything about this moment is so much more real than he was prepared for; from the feel of her skin to the touch of her hands to the smell of her hair.
She's real.
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Date: 2013-07-19 10:46 pm (UTC)"It's me," she clarifies gently, the smile still there on her lips. "It's really me." And then he kisses her and she's lost in her pilot, an emotional hurricane flooding every fiber of her synthetic being.
It's beautiful - everything about this moment is beautiful. The awkwardness of their first kiss, his disbelief, the feeling of his 'shadow' against her skin; all of it is strangely perfect and Gipsy wouldn't have it any other way.
The kiss is sweet and tender and it makes her tremble in his grasp, body quivering a little under his touch. It's responding in ways that she's not familiar with, but ways she'd been warned about.
"Hercules--" She pauses, dragging in a breath and she was stunned at how low her voice sounded at the moment. "I--ah--"
Ahem.
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Date: 2013-07-19 11:03 pm (UTC)She pulls away first and he lets her, presses his lips instead to her forehead and her temple, his hands roving over her spine like he can't help himself from testing out whether or not she's really real or if she's just a hallucination. Despite her repeated reassurances, he's going to need a little time to wrap his head around this.
"Yes, love?" Her voice is beautiful and hearing her say his name like that...
Oh. Oh.
He hadn't thought about it but this is an assault of firsts for Gipsy. She's probably feeling a lot of things she's not used to right now, and damn that's hot. Shit. Keep it together, old man.
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Date: 2013-07-19 11:25 pm (UTC)She sighs and she leans in to kiss him again, eager for the strangely familiar taste of him once more. It reminds her a little bit of being in the Drift - she's been so in tune with him and his thoughts that...well. He tastes a bit like he...felt and that? Wouldn't make sense to anyone other than Gipsy.
She wants everything that he has, she wants to be part of him and be with him like in those memories she'd seen of his and she can tell that that's what her body wants as well but she should really keep it together. Right? Right. She barely knows enough about human nature to jump in head first, though honestly -- isn't that what humans do anyway?
"I missed you." The fingers of her right hand are on his cheek again, tips tracing little paths and lines from his jaw to his ear and back again.
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Date: 2013-07-19 11:35 pm (UTC)Finally, Hercules Hansen isn't a ship loose from its moorings, lost at sea.
Gipsy seems just as eager to kiss him as he is to kiss her, and he would take a moment to marvel at how good she is at this, but then again, she's always been a quick study. He nuzzles a fond little kiss to her lips again, smiling too much to really make it go anywhere, and leans into the brush of her fingertips.
"Oh, darling. I missed you too." So goddamn much.
He's got one hand settled comfortably at the base of her spine, holding her close as the other cradles the back of her neck, his thumb brushing against her hairline, marveling at how perfectly made she is.
"But seriously. How is this even possible?"
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Date: 2013-07-19 11:42 pm (UTC)Or yell at him. Gipsy isn't sure what it is that Hercules feels like doing, but she's fairly certain that he's not going to be all that displeased with the man, if the look in his eyes -- directed at her, and only her -- and the way he's touching her so gently and tenderly is any indication.
"It was his idea. He thought my AI was too well developed to ever truly lose. He had been backing up all of my files, just in case something happened." And...as they both know, something had happened.
"Do you remember the scientists? Newton and Hermann?"
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Date: 2013-07-19 11:49 pm (UTC)How could he be angry? Gipsy is alive again, alive and in a form that lets him actually touch her, kiss her, feel her skin beneath his hands and know that she's real again. He'd been so tempted to Drift, in those long months after the final battle, because then he could relive the moments they shared together, relive the better times with Chuck, relive his friendship with Stacker. But Drifting was too dangerous, it was decided, and he'd been totally cut off, leaving him with rapidly-fading memories.
"God, I could kiss him."
Not going to happen. But the fervent gratitude is there.
"Yeah, of course I do. They're a bit hard to forget."
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Date: 2013-07-19 11:56 pm (UTC)Gipsy's arms fasten around his waist and she stays right there close to him, unwilling to break the embrace that she'd craved for so long.
"They assisted. I am..." She hesitates. "Synthetic, they said. A synthetic human. I look and feel and taste and touch like you, but my bones...they are recycled Jaeger metal." She seems very hesitant to go into more detail -- she doesn't want him to feel weird, and doesn't want him to push her away.
"I'm almost as human as you, Hercules." She's speaking too fast, glossing over more details. "It's just...I have silica pathways instead of blood vessels." She exhales. "And I have to breath and eat and drink, just like you."
And, you know -- she's very obviously female. Tendo was thorough.
"Is it alright?" Gipsy echoes a question she asked him a long time ago, and gives him a similarly anxious look, uncertain of how he's going to react to any of this. She's still technically a machine, when it boiled down to it -- a humanized Jaeger.
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Date: 2013-07-20 12:03 am (UTC)She starts to tell him her story but there's a hesitation to her, a reluctant to go into great detail that has him frowning and cupping her face in one hand.
The last thing he wants is for her to feel uncomfortable around him, he never wanted that.
"Is it alright?" He lifts incredulous brows. "Gipsy, baby, you're alive, of course it's alright!" He couldn't give two shits about her status as a machine or not. She's standing here in front of him, her mind is exactly the same as it used to be, her voice is the same, her hands are the same... Who fucking cares if her bones are metal or she doesn't have proper blood? Hercules certainly doesn't. "Is it alright. Honestly, who do you think I am?"
Shaking his head fondly at her, he kisses her again, nibbling at her lower lip just because he can and because, blood vessels or not, it feels so plush beneath his.
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Date: 2013-07-20 12:09 am (UTC)She'd started to argue, started to tell him that she couldn't be positive how strange he'd think all of this, and if he'd reject the thought of having a Jaeger stand here in front of him, looking and feeling like a human but remaining entirely different at her core.
He answers the question with his kiss, and he has her making a quiet noise against his mouth because that? Is amazing. Her fingers fist in his shirt and she has to remember to dial back - as always - because while she's human on the outside, on the inside she's made of fucking Jaeger metal and could probably punch her way through a goddamn concrete wall.
She mumbles his name and it comes out a little more ragged than she'd anticipated. He's managed to again set all of her senses on fire and she's putty in his hands, pliable and eager and entirely willing.
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Date: 2013-07-20 12:22 am (UTC)He ends up leaning back against the edge of his desk, his knees spread, coaxing her to come closer and stand between them so they're more of a height as he kisses her again.
They should probably stop, they're in his office, for god's sake, but he feels absolutely no desire to stop this, because this involves kissing her until her lips are pink and shiny and then kissing her some more, because damn. She's beautiful, and he has to taste her. Licking past her lips, he strokes his tongue along hers, whatever it was he was planning on saying getting lost between them.
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